My stepmother twists everything and has turned Dad against me
DEAR DEIDRE: My relationship with my dad has fallen apart and my new stepmother is to blame.
She’s hated me since the moment we met and now has succeeded in turning my father against me. I’m devastated.
Dad is 55 and I’m his daughter, aged 27. My stepmum is 38.
After my mother died, 12 years ago, Dad and I grew very close.
It was just him and me and we were both grieving for Mum.
He didn’t date at all until I went away to university. But three years ago, he met this woman. It was hard but I was happy for him, as I didn’t want him to be alone.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page or email us at:
deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk
It was clear she resented me, though, and once she’d got her claws into him she stopped making any effort with me.
Since she moved in with him, she’s told him lies about me – like that I’m mean to her, insult her or have an attitude.
He believes everything she says, which hurts so much. She’s made him choose between us.
He told me I had to apologise to her but I refused, as I haven’t done anything wrong.
Now we haven’t spoken for four months. I know I need to sort it out with him but I’m so angry he’s let her drive a wedge between us.
I’ve started to accept I’m no longer part of my dad’s life. I have a partner, job and good friends but I miss him and I’m so sad about this. Is there anything I can do?
DEIDRE SAYS: There’s nothing more hurtful than having lies told about you, especially when the person closest to you believes them.
You had a particularly close relation-ship with your dad after your mum died and it sounds like your stepmother is jealous of this.
Your dad should never have let this happen. But I’m sure he’s not happy he’s lost contact with you.
He probably feels caught in the middle and doesn’t want, or is scared, to upset her.
Try getting him on his own and telling him how you feel.
Don’t berate your stepmum. Instead, impress upon your dad how sad you feel and how much you love him.
It may help to get support from standalone.org.uk, who support those estranged from family members.