DEAR DEIDRE: The sex worker I’ve got to know can’t have a relationship with me in case she loses her job but I want her to leave that life behind.
I’m a single guy of 34 and this girl is an escort but she only works at the place once a week as she’s trying to pay off her student loan.
She’s training to be a social worker but the pay isn’t great so she supplements her income by doing this sort of work. She’s 23.
There was an instant connection between us and the sex was off the scale. I have a very high libido but I’ve never been able to find a girlfriend. I’ve had a few one-night stands but that’s about it.
I’ve used escort agencies before and that satisfies me but the connection between me and this girl is something else. She’s amazing.
I told her I’d like to see her the next time I needed somebody, but she said she couldn’t guarantee she’d be there so I didn’t pressurise her.
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She was on my mind constantly so I went back after three weeks and, amazingly, she was working.
I told her that I was falling in love with her.
She said that she couldn’t get emotionally attached to me because her boss keeps a close eye, checking they don’t become close to the clients. The last girl who fell for a client got the sack.
We have something special, though — although her boss has been in contact with me and has offered me discounts if I go with another girl.
I don’t want to leave this girl working here. She’s perfect for me.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: She may be, but are you perfect for her? I’m sorry to burst your bubble but if she felt the same, she’d be giving you hints she was interested.
She’d be talking to you about quitting the sex trade and looking to supplement her income some other way.
She makes you feel special because that’s her job. She’s attentive and loving because you are paying for her time.
The guy running the business doesn’t want to lose a popular escort to a punter, hence those discount codes.
Rather than using escorts, networking socially and finding a mutual interest will show you the connection you crave, without it being purely sexual – that can come later.
Aim for friendship first rather than looking for girlfriend material.
My support pack Finding The Love Of Your Life shows you how.