It all went horribly wrong when friends spilled the truth about a cheating husband

DEAR DEIDRE: When I wouldn’t go along with something that made me feel uncomfortable, I ended up falling out with a good friend.

Then my best friend sided with her, so I’m not sure if I can continue with that friendship either.

I’m 32 and my former pal is 33 and my best mate is 34. The problem occurred when my friend told me some gossip concerning another mutual friend – that her husband was having an affair.

We all had a meet-up scheduled for a Friday night and my friend said that when we got together, she was going to tell this other friend what her husband was up to as she deserved to know.

I said it wasn’t our place to reveal the affair and it would only hurt her. But, if she did plan to tell her, it certainly shouldn’t be on a night out with a big group.

I refused to be part of it and didn’t go out. I felt good that I’d stuck to my principles.

But my best friend did go. She agreed that it was right to tell her. Worse, my former friend then turned my best friend against me, saying I was patronising and aggressive.

Now, my best friend is barely speaking to me and thinks I’m in the wrong. We’ve been friends for 15 years and I’m so hurt.

If she didn’t agree with my decision, she could have remained neutral. I care about her but I’m not sure I trust her any more.

DEIDRE SAYS: It’s hard to realise that a good friend doesn’t share your principles. Worse, your best friend not only failed to stand up for you, she now appears to have taken sides.

But, sadly, friends sometimes do grow apart. You may be able to rescue your friendship, but even if that’s not possible, you still need closure.

Tell your best friend you need to talk. Be honest about your feelings.

My support packs Standing Up For Yourself and Rows With Friends should help.

Whatever happens, you have stood up for your principles and done the right thing.