When my brother told us our dad abused him, you helped our family through

DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my brother told me that our dad had sexually abused him when he was little, I was so shocked that it sent me reeling.

I’d always loved my dad and thought of him as a good man - even though he left us when I was six. 

I’m now 48 and my brother is 50. Our dad is 80.

My brother couldn’t remember how old he was when the abuse happened - he only had vague memories - and wasn’t sure if he’d report it.

I felt so confused and torn. I wanted to help him but, at the same time, didn’t want to believe my dad could have done this. 

And I worried how Mum would react.

You were so sympathetic and advised me to talk to a counsellor, sending me your How Counselling Can Help and Abused As A Child support packs. 

I realised I was struggling so went to see my GP, who arranged for me to have CBT.

My brother is also getting help from a counsellor. We’re both supporting our mum.

Thank you so much Deidre, both for your understanding, and for checking up on me. 

DEIDRE SAYS: It will take time for you all to deal with and heal from this. I’m glad you’re getting professional help.