DEAR DEIDRE: I THOUGHT I could trust my boyfriend, but my neighbour says he tried it on with her.
They were in a local pub one evening.
My partner had been drinking and apparently recognised my neighbour standing nearby.
He went over and bought her a drink and, when she said thank you, he tried to kiss her.
I’ve been with him for two years and we live together.
This happened six months ago. We are both 31 and my neighbour is 35.
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She told me what he’d done when we met up at a yoga class recently.
I confronted my boyfriend when I got home, but he told me I’d “ruined everything” because he was going to propose the next weekend. I don’t know what to think.
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DEIDRE SAYS: The truth is, your boyfriend risked your relationship when he hit on your neighbour.
By blaming you, he’s trying to deflect attention away from his own poor behaviour. If he’d been drinking, he may have been acting out of character.
This is no excuse, of course, but if you’ve been happy up until now, and had no other reason to worry, you may decide to give him the benefit of the doubt.
It would be sad to throw away two years of a good relationship over one drunken indiscretion.
Make it clear that if there’s the slightest hint of any cheating in future, you will end it with him.