My boyfriend started faking orgasms after I told him I wanted a baby
DEAR DEIDRE: AFTER I told my boyfriend I wanted a baby he suddenly began faking orgasms.
We’re both 32 and have been together for five years. My clock is ticking and I want to begin a family.
A few weeks ago, we went out with our friends who’d just had a baby. Carrying their newborn daughter made me feel so broody.
But when I brought up the subject later that night, he looked disgusted and said: “Not a chance. I don’t want children.”
Ever since then, he’s been unable to orgasm.
Our sex life had always been fun, and adventurous. My boyfriend was often the one who initiates sex. This change is so unlike him.
Get in touch with the Dear Deidre team
Every problem gets a personal reply from one of our trained counsellors.
Fill out and submit our easy-to-use and confidential form and the Dear Deidre team will get back to you.
You can also send a private message on the DearDeidreOfficial Facebook page or email us at:
deardeidre@the-sun.co.uk
I tried to bring it up, but he denied there was an issue and instead began faking orgasms. It didn’t take long for him to go off sex and now it’s not happening at all.
I’ve dreamt of two young children running around playing with each other, who I can read my favourite childhood books to and go on trips to Disneyland with all of my life.
Now I’m worried my dream will never come true because my boyfriend doesn’t even want to have sex any more. How do I fix this?
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Your partner is feeling anxious, and it’s stopping him from climaxing.
It sounds as though he’s worried about being pressured into having children when he isn’t ready or perhaps doesn’t want them at all.
Anxiety will stop a man from orgasming, and can also put them off sex all together.
It’s time to sit down and talk calmly about what you both want from the future.
You clearly are very keen to start a family but if he doesn’t feel the same you need to determine if that is a temporary status.
If it’s permanent then you have some difficult decisions to make. If it’s temporary then agree a timescale when you will both come back to revisit the issue and resist the temptation to bring it up before then.
By simply talking calmly about the issue your boyfriend may feel more reassured and less anxious.
My support pack, Helping Your Man to Climax will also help you both in bed.