I had incredible sex with a woman twice my age
DEAR DEIDRE: The woman I had incredible sex with is old enough to be my mother.
She wants us to get together to do do it again but I’m not sure if I should get involved.
I’m 23 and she’s 46. We met at a pub where I’d gone with some mates, and got talking. She offered to buy me a drink.
I knew she was older than me but had no idea how much. I guessed she was in her thirties, and she didn’t correct me.
She was extremely attractive and confident, not like women my age. I also loved the fact she had opinions about things and didn’t obsess about her appearance.
Eventually, my friends went off to a club without me. By then, I was quite drunk and she invited me back to hers.
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We had barely walked in the front door before we were kissing. We ended up having mind-blowing sex on her sofa, before she led me upstairs for more. She was so experienced and at ease with her body.
It was the best sex I’ve ever had.
In the morning, over breakfast, she admitted she was 46 — just two years younger than my mum.
I felt shocked, and a bit used. She said my age wasn’t an issue for her. In fact, she loves younger men.
She told me she’d recently divorced and would be keen to see me again. Much as I’d love a repeat performance, I’m not sure it’s a good idea.
MORE FROM DEAR DEIDRE
DEIDRE SAYS: Although you enjoyed having sex with this much older woman, the experience has left you feeling uneasy.
She is 23 years older and, even though you’re both adults and well over the age of consent, this is a very large age gap.
She wasn’t entirely honest with you. It sounds like you may not have gone home with her had you known her real age.
No sexual experience should make you feel like you’ve been used.
I’d advise that you don’t sleep with her again, unless you decide you are entirely comfortable with the age gap.
It would be best to be direct but kind, thanking her for a great night but saying you don’t want to meet up again as there’s no future in this.
If you want to talk to someone about your feelings, contact themix.org.uk, which provides support for under-25s.
My support pack on Age Gaps might also be helpful for you to read.